Ode to my Overhead Squat

I never liked you.

When I saw you on the board I just wanted you over and done with. You scared me, not your weight so much but the oddness of you. Up here over head, where I can’t see you. I don’t know if you’re straight, I don’t know if you’re going to stay put or fall on my head.

I never liked you.

And then I was given you, like a gift.
And I had to look at you again, see who you are, what you wanted.

You want me to look up. You want me to keep my back straight. You want me to dig deep in the bottom of my squat. You want me to keep my core strong.

You want me to rise up from that bottom, keep looking up, with my back straight, core strong and stand tall.

You want me to push. Upwards. All the time.

Now…
I’m starting to like you.
You’ve become like a piece of art I’m creating piece by piece.

How you feel when I clean you. Push press you behind my head. Land on my shoulder. That moment when I look at my one chalked hand reach for the precise place on the bar, then the other. The perfect hand positioning to push you instead of holding you. Looking up at the sign of Box name above my head, focus on the top of the F of CrossFit. Inhale, compress the breath, contract my core, feel my legs as I bend back and with control go down in the bottom of my squat where I feel like the me I hope to be. Feel how light you become when I push hard up against you, use my legs and rise up from the bottom of that squat and stand tall.

I’m starting to like you. I think I’m going to love you.

Emancipation: From ring rows to pull ups!

Not everyone starts CrossFit being able to do pull ups. I used to do my wods on ring rows until I started dreaming of pull ups.

Long before this dream of pull ups manifested itself firmly in my spirit I thought I had to be lighter until I started asking questions about it. The answers I got were about upper body strength, being lighter etc. Oddly enough I researched everywhere but asking my coach and one day we were talking about weightloss etc at gym, I mentioned this and he told me the story of how he got a client to do pull ups with isometric holds

Here’s what I read about Isometric holds:

Isometric’, like a lot exercise jargon, comes from the Greek, and means simply ‘equal distance’. That’s to emphasize the big difference between these sorts of exercises – there’s no movement. Instead of moving your joints through a pairing of contraction, and then extension, with an isometric hold, you keep the joints at a fixed angle, while your muscles contract – hence equal distance.

Holding a contraction, whilst under resistance, forces the muscle to recruit a greater and greater number of muscle fibers, just to keep the hold in place. So you are stressing – and so re-growing – and much greater proportion of your muscle fibers, equating to faster and bigger boosts to strength.

Since I have been doing the holds I have seen exponential strength increase in other movements.

- My full push ups are better

- My band assisted ring dips have better lock out at the top

- I progress from band to band every 2 weeks (so from green to black/purple),

- I did an L-sit by accident

- My handstand hold is stronger – could hold away from walk for almost 5 seconds

- The other day I even got band assisted chest to bar

I thought I’d share my Isometric plan I got from my coach, cause frankly all crossfitters needs to be emancipated from the ring rows at some point and pull ups does NOT fall from the sky!

Here are the steps:

1. First thing you’re gonna need are resistance bands, the pull up rig is a given.

2. The program covers 4 holds/movements (each of them overhand and underhand):

a.Chin over bar

b.90 degree hold

c.slightly bent arm hold

d.Negative lowering down .

I’ll explain each separately.

3. Things to consider here: depending on your start upper body strength you must test which band give you assistance but also not too much…. You dont want the band to do all the work, the point is to get isolated muscles stronger to do the work. You do the work, not the band. Lets go…

4. Chin over bar: Use resistance band to get chin over bar. Hold for 3-5 seconds for 5 sets. Overhand then underhand.

5. 90 degree hold: same as for chin over, just arms bent at 90 degrees, same time and sets. Also over and underhand.

6. Slightly bent arm hold: also exactly the same time/sets/over and underhand. Just like the muscly dude in the pic.

7. Negative: chin over bar, let yourself down slowly (coach says 10s) must be controlled. 1 rep only over and underhand. Doing it properly, slowly, controlled will give you a quiver and a head rush. That’s how I know I did it right. With this movement you have now used all the muscles, tendons etc utilized in a pull up, just the opposite way.

Do this 3 times/week. It takes less than 7 min after class every time. The benefits can be seen so quickly, also in other movements like as I said before. The other fantastic thing is …okay maybe it’s just me…Isometric holds makes my guns grow!

Side chirps:
* In the meantime I have also been working on my kip. Kip is the movement where you use your hips, to get momentum to reset your pull up in order to do multiples as is required in many of our wods. I learnt you have to get a rhythm, almost feel it more than doing it. This video below gets kips going before I even get to gym.

* This is an expression of my experience with getting to pull up progression. Others may have different views or schools of thought.

* I think athletes that already have pull ups might get some benefit including these holds too. One thing that’s become less of an problem, is getting tired doing pull ups, I suspect because there is strength.

Mountain Biking Voodoo!

Launch pad. Attack position. Speed is your friend.

Not words I expected to hear in the first sentence of my Mountain Biking Skills Clinic. I kept saying: “There’s a gap here Jo, when are you going to tell us about braking?”

A few months ago from somewhere the impetus to try this mountain biking thing started. I sent Jo a message and asked if she ever does such a thing, I would totally join. Joanna Dobinson is the person that was there at the start when my fitness journey. Adventure Bootcamp, Stellenbosch, November 2008….I think the first post of this blog was the night before that fateful day. Jo is not only an ace mountain biker but also the most patient instructor, a born teacher. Challenges the glasshoppa but also takes time to make sure of comfort levels throughout the session, proven once again today.

JoJo!

So today I attended my first skills clinic. I suspect there will be more. I can ride my bike, on the road, no problem. The first drill was to ride down a tiny downhill piece of ground, get into attack position, feather the breaks and at the turn gear down and go back up. IN. ONE. GO.

Easier said than done…well my ‘classmate’ Lelani totally aced it. I earned half a gold star. From somewhere I got the fear of downhill at speed…what the hell…and it wasn’t evens a proper downhill…sloped at best. Anyway, I kept at it…between chirping patient-as-a-saint Jojo of course. (She must’ve gotten bootcamp flashbacks. I earned Jolly roger award on my first camp I’ll have you know. Nice way of saying ‘smartass’ really).

Lelani in attack mode!

After the attack pose drill we progressed to the Launchpad…yeah that’s right. Launch. Pad. It looked fearfully like a bootcamp course on leg day…with those brightly coloured cones. This is where I learned about mountain biking voodoo. Did you know that your bike will go where your eyes look? This had me in a bit of a mental tizz: like we are human, with brains that control arms, legs and whatnots….why does my bike go where my eyes look if my arms are turning it? Are my arms connected to my eyes then?

I soon discovered it’s true. After I got home, I asked a person of male persuasion about this, who suggested I try it with my car on a long bend. Mmmmm…smartass!

After spending an hour so at the LAUNCH PAD we progressed out to Jonkershoek’s single tracks. It was a bit of ride there, I had squat-bike and run legs when I got there…so by then flag was hanging half-mast but I soldiered on. (Note to self: don’t go mountain biking with used legs again)

At the single track we were going to put into practice everything we had learned up until then including Root riding. I heard Route riding, so when Jo started pointing at roots of the trees in our path…I felt well…quite dof! So we learned how to ride next to them and over them and let me tell you…’your bike does go where you look’ …isn’t voodoo after all!

Next up was Switchback riding. I am totally throwing around the lingo now! (Yahhhhhhh okay, I only realized it was a switchback after we finished the drill and on the way back.) So this was a bend on an uphill..gulp! We had to manoeuvre our way up and down….over and over. ‘n Nogge gulp!

I suppose I got the other half of my gold star there (foeitog)…I eventually got it. I think if I had to just do it, I’d get it but like many other things that have a multiple of intricate details that I am aware of, my thinking process blocks the doing process. Sounds like CrossFit don’t it.

We headed back…on tar road (hallelujurrrr said the roadie inside me)… Jo suggested that we now practice slip stream riding. That means, stay within 1m of the rider in front of you (and keep up the pace ninja). So off we set down Jonkershoek, Jo in front, me in the middle, Lelani behind me. That was the awesomest part of my day (damn roadie!)…I kept up, pushed hard on the hills, using all the power my little legs have. Went down hills at speed too! (Yah, I don’t get my mind either)

I will become a regular face at Ride In attending Biking in the Bosch’s social rides (after I do my MTB homework and I think another skill session). It is the perfect environment to learn how to ride my Peggy Sue on the trails. I’ve always been fearful of falling off and a bit apprehensive to join dudes on rides. In road cycling you see the road ahead and have time to make decisions. Not knowing how to do that on mountain biking trails is what kept me off them, but not anymore!

Celebration: Concentrated Power of Will

Last few days I’ve wondered how many times one can play a song on repeat before its no longer normal. Well! I think I’m beyond a 100 times now. Its on my mp3 player, in the car…

The line that hits the spot is Concentrated Power of Will. A few weeks ago, I let go of the Unlikely Athlete. That’s no longer who I am.  (With that a name change for this blog too.) 2013 is not the year I just finish things. Its the year I push harder, faster, higher, further and rock at things.

And so much has happened so far…I can do handstands, progressing in pull ups, moered off the pull up bar and got back on cause there was time left on the clock…

CrossFit has become a channel through which my spirit is ignited, it is so much more than physical gains that I get from it. It is as if it speaks to who I am, amplifying the fire and passion that has always been a part of me.

I’ve seen darkness in my life and dragged myself out of many holes many times. Thankfully these days I barely use even 20% of the inner strength it cultivated and  instead I channel more and more into this beloved sport of mine.

Doing things I never in my wildest dreams imagined. By all standards I am at the start of the journey and when I think of what’s ahead I get a giddiness and a broad smile. I suspect I’m about to have the time of my life….

What makes this adventure all the more awesome is the people I get to share this love with. Someone who have not met any of us but through out box’s facebook group commented on how she can see how much spirit we have…that was fantastic to hear..because somewhere somehow the box has been set on fire…

There’s also the unwavering belief of special souls who on a daily basis express belief in me. Sometimes belief in things I’m not even convinced I can do. The gratitude I have is immeasurable…its been a catalyst to my progression as an athlete. You know who are.

Doing double sessions lately, I get to see my boxmates wod it out while I work on other weaknesses and its fantastic to see. Ever just stop and watch a roomful of men do 1RM deadlift?….you can feel the brute strength in the air. Proud to be a ninja alongside them.

In a few weeks we’re going to Regionals. When I came home the Sunday evening after Fittest in Cape Town I put the words ’2013 CrossFit Games Africa Regionals Competitor’ on my vision board…and now in just a few shorts weeks it’s happening. Concentrated power of will? You bet.

This is an exciting time in my life, it’s a dream come true and its all I think, drink, eat, sleep about.  Every day celebrating my concentrated power of will!

Wallballs are not the boss of me!

On Thursday we did CrossFit Open workout 13.3. It was a 150 wall balls (for non crossfitters that is squat down with a 6.5kg medicine ball get up from the squat and throw/push it up to hit a target 2.5m above your head one hundred and fifty times). Jeez! Writing it out in words does make it look like a dumb*ss idea. Add to that 90 double unders (skipping with rope passing twice under feet) and if that’s not enough, follow it up with 30 muscle ups (hand on rings high above ground, pull yourself up and lock out your arms on top). Hectic? Perhaps. Do it all in a 12 minute time cap. Heck yeah!

No fear people. I did no such thing as hoisting myself up on rings. (Yet). I got to 86 wall balls and I’m proud of this score because of what had transpired the days before made that moment magical.

In this sport of mine, we do many things with a lot of repetitions. A lot, as in hundreds sometimes.  They are generally called chippers. Why? Cause they chip away at your sanity I always thought. In truth they chip away I think at your weakness, getting through them to the other side changes you from the person you were before you walked into that box. But I don’t want to write about that.

During the “CrossFit Open”, a new workout is released each week. Athletes all over the world have several days to complete the workout and submit their scores online, with either a video or validation by a CrossFit affiliate. The top CrossFit Open performers in each region advance to the regional events, held over the following two months.

Besides for doing the workout at our gym there is also a Cape TownCrossFit Community Tour going on, we can either do the workout on a Thursday or a Saturday (with other CrossFit boxes) or in some cases both. At our box this week Thursday was a public holiday and everybody was going to be there. My facebook, whatsapp and bbm was abuzz with activity from early as the box mates awakened and started discussing the workout, all excited to do it together.

I got there and it was just a chatter of voices, some were serious, some  nervous, others trying not to be and some who attempted to just fake it till you make it. I had my serious face I think, cause by then I’d absorbed all the vibes, sponge that I am. I think one of the guys told me to smile.

I decided to go in the first heat to just get it done, cause I enjoy cheering my boxmates and taking pictures. (Yohhhhhh I’m getting longwinded with this post now). Hes decided to judge me. At the start she said: “I don’t like judging my girls, I don’t like no-repping you.” (For non crossfitters – yes even as you do all them things I described up top – if you don’t do them according to standard – it’s a no-rep).

3.2.1…Go…and we started. 5 balls in I got my first no rep. Now I don’t want to repeat in words that whole 12 minutes ball by ball. Let’s just say I think I got about 30 no reps, ended up with a score of 64. Now that is almost more than half of last year’s  scoreand a thing to be proud of. CrossFit is about progression, to become a better you than before.

What got to me was the amount of no reps. I didn’t realize this at first. Some of us went to breakfast and the more and more we talked about it the more upset I got. I was annoyed. I was distracted. I didn’t have a plan when I started out. I was tired from the day before. I was muscling the ball with my arms and not thrusting from my legs, making it and me loose cannons. These were the thoughts accumulating in my head as I was smiling and making my way through my bacon and eggs.

I decided to go for a swim to shake the mood and get over myself. After I got home one of my dear CrossFit friends messaged to ask why I was so upset.

I was upset because I let myself down by getting so many no reps. It’s thrusters (squatting down with weight, getting up, pushing weight ove head) for crying out loud. I am an air squat demon and its 6.5kg. And explaining that to him had me in tears, crying like a girl over shoving a ball up a wall – the wrong way. Sounds stupid now doesn’t it!?

After my swim which cheered me up a little I went to my mom. And when I explained why I was misty she said: don’t be so hard on yourself, this is supposed to be play, don’t put so much pressure on that you stop enjoying it, then don’t want to do it anymore and lose everything your sport have given you so far. Moms give the best advice.

So yesterday I had the opportunity to do the workout again. I decided on a plan and read up on some tips. Oly’s they said. (Oly’s are my Olympic lifting shoes, a wedge heel that make me a smidgen taller and keeps me stable). So I packed my Ballistix Fitness Oly shoes and dressed up in pink long socks. Hes and I decided to take the edge off by wearing silly wigs to boot.

What edge? CrossFit is a competitive sport, with yourself, others in your box, in the community and now in the Open with others in the world too. The numbers (workout times, your weightlifting max scores, weights used during workout, progression of movements etc) play a part and if you don’t kick your heels in sometimes and refuse to let it define you, the numbers will eat you alive. Until one day you realize: “I don’t want to be in the box. This pressure sucks. ”….Take a break, learn to define yourself by other things too and return a better rounded athlete.

I’ve been through that ebb and flow with this sport twice, each time return more connected with the psychological element of the sport. The numbers are still important. I have my goals. I am working on them, but I am not going to be come that Rockstar athlete overnight and while it all falls into place I’m supposed to play, my mom said.

So yesterday that’s what I did. I didn’t think about the work out. I didn’t practice double unders so I could get as many if I should finish all 150 wall balls. A few minutes before I chose to have conversations with other athletes and cheering on the heats that came before ours. Also chose to do it with Hes in a heat cause I knew her effort would spark me on.

And that is EXACTLY what happened. As I was pacing mine, with the awesome judge that helped me counting down between breathing breaks I did well and soon passed my previous score. (Turning to my coach smiling!)I then heard where Hes was scoring at and I turned to shout and encourage her. Her time looked good and it would mean she’d get to muscle ups. Yeah sure….I could’ve used the time to do  4 or 5 extra wall balls every time I did that but a quick word/smile with my coach and cheering for my box mate feels better right now than those possible missed reps.

Taking it back to play got me 22 more reps than Thursday. This is a mental game, but not in the way conventional way with positive thoughts and beast mode etc. It’s a mental game in that you must forget about it and clear your head, heart and mind of CrossFit for a day or two every now and then to become a better athlete.

The longest chipper

Today I had my ass handed to me. Been training for Two Oceans Half, a race that has a cut-off of 3hrs…this year though increased to 3hr10m. What does this means? It means you can train for months, run your race, miss the cut-off and it was like you were never there. You keep novice status no matter how many times you complete that 21.1km outside the cut-off time. But this isnt supposed to be a rant about that. I decided to run a half marathon to get my head around the distance again before then.

Today I ran Milkwood Half marathon. I set out with a plan. I divided my race into 3 stages of 7km each and aimed to run each of them at even pace. The first one came quick, the route was flat , with downhill after 1km. I also ran on effort and didnt keep checking my Garmin, just made sure I kept cadence up, heart rate just so and in my centre of gravity and not striding. After the first hill the route was along a mountainous hang, nice and cool with the ocean on the other side.

At some point one of the marshalls at a water table sad to me: ‘Conserve your energy there’s another hill ahead.” Thanks marshall!

It was near the half way mark – I manouevred it as comfortably as one can at that point. The downhill was faster as is custom. Somewhere around 12 km I got – well, there is no polite way to say this – I got a dull crampy ache in my left butt cheek. By then my feet were starting to feel it, by the lovely warm feel on the sole of my right foot I knew blister numero uno was born. I got to 14km, at just about 2hrs. Although tender by then, I had a whole hour left to do 7km.

I am a strong person, small heart but tough as nails…but somewhere around there was a loop. A freaking loop. Where you have to turn round and come back, runners all over the world hate loops. And that I think is where things started going pear shaped.

My crossfit alter ego told me: “You can get his cheap thrill from Fran too, and she takes you less than 10min. What the hell were you thinking?”

The rest of the route were through residential, partially gravelly and just the most annoying way to end a scenic race. My walks became longer and slower and I did the last 7km as long as it takes me to run 10km. My time 3h25 and some change. 15min off my first half, Tyger run last year.

I guess I have to look at the positives, count my blessings, be proud of finishing and what not. Right now though I’m not. I’m pissed off at myself, not sure for what exactly. I knew I could do 3hrs, I knew it! But I didn’t! And that sucks.

Tomorrow I’ll be thankful.

A touch of madness

You can have it all, with a little compromise and prioritizing.

I’ve taken on a lot lately. Physically that is. Signed up for EmbarkTri beginner programme which means a run, swim and bike session a week, entered Two Oceans half marathon for the 3rd time and continuing my CrossFit journey with the games and regionals coming up. All of this to happen by May.

Right now I’m reading Paulo Coelho’s Aleph and today I read this line: ‘No life is complete without a touch of madness.’ Many people in my life comment on my commitment and their admiration of how I do it all. If only they knew it’s all fueled by a touch of madness.

I used to work hard, study hard, living with passion…growing mentally. During that time always realizing it’s a little unbalanced because I wasnt physically active. At all. Now it feels like its all in sync.

The added catalyst is discovering week after week that my limits are not where I left them.

The last 3 weeks I’ve been forgetful, scatterbrained. It left me unsettled and caused my technique to slip, forgetting my car ignition on, got a scheduled meeting time wrong and other stupid little mishaps. I was tired but not fatigued.

This morning I realized the time to compromise has come, I knew this was inevitable way back early January when I started my year. As much as I love my sport, its not my religion. Today I forfeited a group swim to get my mileage up for Two Oceans. I figured I can swim, I have the program and can do it on the weekend.

We did thrusters 1RM this morning at CrossFit, I couldn’t get past 35kg and my previous max is 45kg. Coach said: ‘there is a lot of power in your legs.’

This evening I ran my best 10km….he was right again, as always (I really dont know how I always end up proving him right)…today it just wasnt meant for the lifting. And that has also become part of the compromise. I know that with all the activity some things will be awesome and others not so much. And that is okay. I have an unwavering belief that it will all come together.

My run proved that. I ran an unbroken 10km. No walking but for when the mp3 cable got tangled or when I stopped for water on the way. I dont think I’ve ever had such a good run; strong body, breathing in sync, no niggles and not a single negative thought and the last half faster than the first, sprinting the last bit down the road home.

So from here on out I’m prioritizing according to the dates of the particular events. There are 3 weeks round end March that gonna need an extra sprinkle of magic cause its Crossfit Games Open wod, Two Ocean Half and a duathlon that must happen. The duathlon will have to be seat of pants…5km run, 20km cycle, 2.5km run is not the end of the world. I do CrossFit, Wednesday chippers are worse!

I’m just grateful for a lifestyle, job and body that allows me all these endeavors. 2013 is the year of magic!

I can and I will – by the seat of my pants

In about 3 weeks I think it is, I am competing in my first triathlon. I’m using the word ‘competing’ very loosely here, I have an entry, will pitch, will finish.There is no rhyme or reason for entering it besides I want to and I can.

I started training for it a few weeks ago. And typically me, not the conventional way. As you know from talking to me, reading my blog etc. I do Crossfit. Its come to be such a integral part of my life. Yes, I’m addicted, but its more than just a physical reaction….so much more.

Training for endurance sport and crossfit is a lot on the body. When I realized this I asked Neil (coach at Ballistix Crossfit) how I could programme it into my current activities. Neil pointed me towards Crossfit Endurance website.

“CrossFit Endurance is an endurance sports training program dedicated to improving performance, fitness and endurance sports potential. We focus on eliminating unnecessary volume of training while increasing intensity. Our programming is structured, sport-specific and seamlessly integrated with Olympic lifts, powerlifting, gymnastics movements, explosive activity and mobility-based support.”

This kind of programming was perfect, as it was the mere time and planning long runs, cycles etc that I was stumped on. Try running 15km and then do a couple of kettlebell swings and box jumps the next day. Your body will hate you!

So I was well on my way. CFE programming is 3 x interval sessions (swim+bike+run), 3 – 4 Crossfit workouts and 1 long session (swim/bike/run) a week. At first it was hard, I was tired, worn out, my arms hurt from swimming when I did my version of pull ups etc. And then the flippin ITB struck again – my own fault really – cause there is mos never time for mobility. I took a step back – my body wanted Crossfit and swimming and thats what I did. I ran 2 x 10 km races which had good and bad results…I saw spurts of strength and definitely an improvement in pace, but I also experienced the most horrendous cramps.

Its been a few days since then, I’ve made an effort on mobility, had massages and increased my vitamins, minerals and added something other than protein and sweet potato to my supper routine. This weekend I saw the gains in that.

This past weekend I did a simulation on my triathlon distance. I entered the sprint distance which is 600m swim, 20km cycle and 5km run. I decided to do it from Strand pool where I swam the 600m in one go a few Sundays back and did it in 17m30s. I asked my friend Zuriah to accompany me, for some reason I didn’t want to do it alone. And what a blessing she was, we joked around, she took a video clip of my swim (ungraceful is an understatement) and was just there for me while I undertook the longest training session ever.

I decided to do it from Strand Pool, since its 50m lengths it would be over soon. But as we drove up to the pool parking lot it was uncharacteristically full for a Saturday morning. Thats when I realized there was a swim meet on. Z just shook her head – “you didn’t check ahead?” rolling her eyes at me. I am the Unlikely Athlete, things are never that well planned. Seat of the pants is the motto here!

So we drove to Virgin active, my heart sinking a little at the prospect of swimming 600m with 25m length. Yoh! the tediousness I was in no mood for. Z determined that it was 24 times. 24 times!!! My head wanted to explode. Then she said she’ll stay by the pool and count it down for me and thats what she did. At some point I got a little tired, a little bored and its at that exact time she started walking up and down the pool alongside as I was splashing away. Seeing her image kinda spurred me on. Thanks my friend. In no time I was on 18 lengths and nearing the end. I finished in just over 20 minutes not as fast as I’d hoped but I was happy with it.

Next up was the bike leg. The night before I asked my triathlete she-ro @Beanker about outfit changes during transition, she pretty much said you cycle in swim gear. Me being me…had thoughts of chafing, itching etc and was going to do my own thing and change from swimsuit to bib-shorts. Gha! Thats what I thought. Getting to my bag I realized I’d left my towel at home. I rinsed off the chlorine and tried to get into that bib-shorts with a dripping wet body. This took about 15 minutes, nearly as long as my swim.Oh my goodness! I guess if you don’t listen you must feel.

Finally we left gym, I got PeggySue from the car and I was on my way. Z waiting in the car for me armed with a book. It was a windy day in the village where I live but it wasn’t cold, so I could cycle in good weather gear. I went up the road towards Firgrove, turned left onto the Strand road, turned just before the bridge and pedalled back towards Eersterivier, turning again at those new developments. When I got to 15km I stopped and sent Z an update (to which she later chirped “why did you message me – you must cycle”. (I knew then why I wanted her along). My cycle was strong, my pace remaining the same on inclines but the wind was a bugger. Again I was happy with my ride….but realized this is the section that I need to sharpen in the time that’s left before race day….I dawdled in the beginning a little.

By the time I got back to the car I was feeling guilty to have my friend sit there and insisted dropping her off at the flat before my run. This is when Z discovered that I didn’t really have a cycle route or run route planned ahead. Uhhhh duh….read note above. Seat. Of. Pants.

I changed to running gear in a shot and we headed home, I left from the parking lot while Z made herself at home in the flat. It was warmer by then but I was strong….I started running at a good pace from outside the gate and kept that up for most of the way – it was just 5km afterall. On the way back I could feel the strength still in me, but also the heat and a bit of tiredness set in and slowed down my pace and it was 7 minutes longer than I wanted.

I did this simulation for 2 reasons. To show my body that for once my spirit wrote a cheque it can cash and also to look for kinks and here they are.

1. I must cycle and run in swim gear and running pants just changing shirts for bike and run. Yes you get tri-shorts. No I’m not throwing anymore money at the problem. I’ll test it out beforehand.

2. I will never ever forget a towel again – from now on its the first thing in the bag

3. Planning the route may not be a bad idea

4. My gear plan will shave 30 minutes off my time

5. I need some bike intervals and bric sessions in the 3 weeks

6. I did that session after 2 days of Crossfit training – imagine what difference a few rest days before race day will do

Things that went well and that I’m continually chuffed with is my nutrition. 32Gi is the best fuel ever. This time I added a sachet of Rehidrat into my bottle for the bike. On race day I’ll take my Camelbak along as well. I also took the Endure Tabs, which I just kept in my mouth till they dissolve, much better than the chews.

So what now. Now I focus on getting my mind right. I’ve had some discouragement the last week or so that made me doubt and invalidate how far I have come and what I’ve achieved so far. Maybe it was a blessing cause it made me face myself and dig deep in finding my own validation for this physical path I am on and its made me even more determined. Everyday….I get faster, stronger, slimmer. Someday I wont be slow anymore, my body weight exercises will kick ass cause I’ve had my chubby folds to help me get there. This is my journey and it needs no validation from anyone but me.

Also I’ll focus on visualizing the course. Not that I can cause I haven’t been there but I will do my best to use my experience in the simulation to do that. I know where I need more internal support. I also need a freaking safe phrase if I freak out in the dam water, I’m a silent panicker which in this case is another blessing. In a way during my swims I’ve almost tried to induce panic to see how I react. I’ve just got to face the fear and do it anyway. Oddly its not the water I fear but the squishy mush below. Eeeeuuuuw!

Lastly this race is not a watershed kind of a thing for me like how some of my first races were. Its just something I want to do. I know I can and I will.

The gratitude blogpost

On the 1st of July I had a lunch with my #heartcircle. Awesome friends I met on twitter but who have taken up residency in the folds of my heart. The 4 of us had planned for ages to get together and on that blessed Sunday it finally happened.

From the moment we walked into @MissyMac77′s flat we chattered like people who see each other every day and have known one another for years. The giggles and laughs continued until we left.

So later that night when I tucked myself warm into bed, pulling my Gratitude Journal closer to jot down as I do in the evenings or mornings, I tweeted it.

This sparked off a response from the girls and from there our hashtag #30DaysOfGratitude was born. Since then we tweet once a day something that we are thankful for. Its taken up resonance with other followers and when I search the hashtag, I see others doing it too. The 30 days has been over for a while now but the gratitude has become the thread that binds us together somehow.

So what is this giving thanks all about? I can only relate this from my perspective and it comes from this place. I am a fixer, when I am faced with a problem I can not rest unless I’m in fix mode. This calms me in the face of a crisis. I am not superhuman, and stress silently. Over the years finding the tiny tiny sliver of hope in a dire situation has calmed me enough to be able to strategize a plan to fix a problem. This was my saving grace through a broken heart, broken business and broken spirit.

Today its the touch stone for my inner strength. I always try and look for a positive or something to be grateful for. 5 months ago I quit an unsustainable work situation that provided a significant part of my income. I wasn’t entirely sure how I will supplement that gap in my cashflow but I believed I would be okay. I was grateful for what I had and in my journal and my conversation with myself kept saying: I am grateful for my abundance.

And slowly but surely I have been getting new work. So much so that at this very moment, I have a few projects I’ve taken on l but haven’t even started working on yet, with more on the horizon.

My abundance didn’t just come in terms monetary value, its also been manifested in terms of personal relationships. I’m in a place where my friendships are centered around a shared love. Shared love for running, cycling, crossfit, being healthy, science, social development and just being awesome.

Living from a place of gratitude brings abundance.

Everything Is Possible

I bought my bike last year after doing lots of spinning. Spinning which I started to make me a better runner. Isnt it funny how many of my exploits start out fuelled with intentions of being a better runner.

Anyway, I entered the Knysna Cycle Race months ago. I intended doing the 100km but in recent months I learned to take a long view on things. Learnt what its like to just be good at something and then moving the goal posts to bigger challenges instead of biting off more than I can chew, then stressing about it and not having fun. I downgraded to 50km.

 

So this weekend past was race weekend. I discovered as it got colder that I am a fairweather cyclist. I was so not keen on riding in the cold (that may have changed a little). I didn’t train much. Well that’s a lie. I didn’t do any cycling for this race. With my Crossfit workouts and bad weather I managed to do 2 spin classes in the last month or so.

So race day came. I met up with an old friend at the start, she didn’t do the race but 2 of her friends I met the day before lined up with me. At the start we were all giggles already.

 

After much worrying about the weather we had clear skies. I was dressed warmly, ready to strip off if it heats up during the day. I had checked out the route as we had driven in and out of the Knysna the last day or so, the route was from Knysna to Sedgefield and back, with rolling hills.

So we set off, the first couple of kilometres were flat along the lagoon and over the bridge. Then the incline started. I was a little nervous about it but remember what I learnt during the Burger preparation. Gear down, get a rhythm and spin it out. That’s what I did. I fell behind from the girls but didn’t let it phase me. My mental conversation went like this: Relax, just pedal, lower resistance, don’t push the pedal, just one relaxing pedal stroke after the other. I repeated these words over and over, while getting a loud rhythmic breathing thing going.

Before I knew it I was over the hill and burning up. I am a warm girl i.e. I get hot quickly so stopped to strip off a layer, hydrate and eat something. Oh and update facebook and twitter as you do.

On came some flats and downhills and I got momentum. The wind was picking up and strangely it didn’t hold me back like a few months ago when riding in a breeze felt like crossing a mountain. I welcomed it to cool me down.

By 12kms I was comfortable and just doing my thing. Now and then Susan waited up for me to see if I’m alright and then be off again. A large part it was just me, Peggy Sue(yes, she has a name) and the road. On the flat sections I was sprinting, I could feel my quads of steel and hip flexors of granite rocking it.

At 25km in Sedgefield we turned around and headed back to Knysna. I was so chuffed that I’d done it. I’d done the race. Note: On an out and back route in running I count the out mileage only, the other half is just going home.

I fuelled and hydrated again, and was on my way over a few more hills. I got off the bike twice for short periods and pushed a little. I’m CrossFit not saddle fit, so some parts were getting a bit worse for wear. When I got on the last hill, I told myself: I am not getting off this bike again until the finish. I did my mantra over and over again and just did one relaxing peddle stroke after the other…and then I looked up and saw flags, Pick n Pay tent and Susan and Kimmy waiting. I had some coke and Bar One at the table and we cheered as we started down the hill towards the lagoon. We flew down….okay I flew a little slower – still can’t manage to free down completely yet…one day.

At the lagoon I caught up with them and we did the last 4 kms together….’tits to the wind” as we called it. So much laughs and giggles, it was awesome. I even sprinted across the finish line like they do on TV.

It was the first Cycle Race I finished (going back in December to settle the score with Die Burger) and it was also my longest ride ever. I was/am so proud of myself. And I can totally see myself doing Argus next year. With CrossFit and some saddle time anything is possible! No, scrap that…..Everything Is Possible.